How Being Present Increases Happiness in Retirement
I love the game of soccer. I played it growing up for many years and still try to catch as many games as I can. Those who share my love of the game certainly know who Lionel Messi is – arguably the best player to ever play the game. He was recently offered a historic $1.6 billion to sign with a Saudi club. He declined it and surprised the world by signing with a US soccer club owned in part by another great of the game, David Beckham.
Beckham was trying to land Messi for years but knew it was a long shot. Earlier this year he woke up one morning to a shocking text informing him that he had landed Messi. Just recently Messi moved to Miami and had his debut game. As Messi got ready to take the field, thousands of fans and celebrities whipped out their phone to record the moment. As I watched Messi come onto the field, the camera panned to Beckham who was sitting down, patiently watching Messi and fully taking in the moment.
Moments later, a camera caught Beckham shed a few tears as he watched Messi take the field. I was surprised by the emotions coming up in me just watching this all unfold through a TV. Watching Beckham, it was clear that this moment was just as meaningful for him as what he had imagined it would be years prior when signing Messi was still a pipe dream.
This got me thinking about my own dreams and those of my clients. I’ve heard the phrase that in life “the anticipation is greater than the realization” but I think that’s a shame. There should be planning and anticipation but the ability to be fully present when the moment arrives is what makes all the dreaming and sacrifice worthwhile. I read a book a few years back, The Comfort Crisis, that talked about how society’s increasing inability to be present in the moment has been linked to increasing levels of anxiety and depression. Being present seems to be foundational for our emotional health.
So, what have you been dreaming of and what would it look like to be fully present when those become a reality? Here are a few ideas -
After saving to put your child or grandchild through college, take a trip to get lunch with them on campus and ask them about their classes.
If you gave to your Alma Mater, go in person to the student grant ceremony for the scholarships that you helped fund.
When you go to visit your grandchildren, consider putting away your regular routine and engaging fully in the child’s routine (here’s your excuse to eat a bowl of sugary cereal and watch cartoons with them).
On the big family trip that you planned for years, make some extra time and room in your budget to take the whole family out to dinner and tell them how grateful you are for them.
When you give to your church’s building campaign, stop by a few months after the unveiling and find a quiet room in the church to pray and appreciate what your giving helped create.
On a Saturday morning, have brunch with your spouse or a friend – ask them what book they’ve loved lately – then go read it.
Just a few ideas. Do you have any of your own? I’d love to hear them.
Happy Planning,
Alex
This blog post is not advice. Please read disclaimers.